Life, death, kids, iron-man

Radio: bla bla bla bla Iron Man 2 bla bla bla

Previously very quiet, kids #1, 2, 3 (in unison): When is Iron Man 2 coming out? When? When mommy?

Me: Well, I don’t know guys, they weren’t talking about the movie, they just said the name.

4 year old: What? Why? But when is it coming out then?

Me: Amm, like I said… I have no idea.

3 year old: Well, when is Spiderman 3 coming out?

I think I was close to a breakdown yesterday morning. Very close. There was a 2 inch think hard layer of ice and snow on my car, I was late for a meeting, I was late for taking one kid to school, the second one had diarrhea, the third had a flu and was a constant crying mess, the van doors were all frozen shut, the ice scraper was in the garage (because, hi – it’s April, altho, yes, I am aware I do live in Canada), and the garage door was also frozen shut. I became a sobbing mess in my car, out of breath and with frozen hands, while my kids watched me quietly. The good news though is that I recover very quickly, and usually am able to retain perspective.

Today I cried for little Maddie, who I don’t even know, but it’s amazing how the loss of this precious soul could bring together so many people, and help us all to be really grateful for what we do have.

You may want to call me morbid, but I do think about death a lot. I feel like I need to have a plan, just in case something happens. But mostly I feel like, I don’t want to have any regrets, I don’t want to feel like I didn’t say “I love you” enough, or hugged enough, or that I was angry to much for no reason, or that I should have showed my love more.

I often think life is to short for crap, and honestly I think it helps me keep focus on the important things – most of the time anyways. So, love a little more, argue a little less, and tonight hug your kids a little tighter.