Love Thursday & things that made me weep

Or, on love and pain…

Often I find myself wondering why love is so powerful. How it manages to make us feel every possible emotion all at once. But mostly how empty we feel without it.

Some days I wake up with headaches so bad that I wonder if I even slept at all. Most of those days I lay in bed pondering the point of my life, but I almost always find something waiting for me that confirms what I already know is true, that there is a larger purpose to life, that my hardship is a test, and that love, no matter how painful, seems to be worth it.

Yesterday morning, I woke up to a very unexpected email. I’ll share some of it with you…

I also wanted to say that your post today about being kind to people – I loved it. I realized that my empathy/sympathy/kindness/compassion levels are at its most acute when I feel pain myself; I guess then I project the kindness I wish I was receiving… or something like that…

I also wanted to say – even though we’re not in contact, or friends, or even email buddies. I love your blog, I make duah for you, and my mom, who is on hajj at the moment, has a list of names for duahs I requested her to make on my behalf (I don’t even know if that’s permissible; well, the duas will come from her anyway, so that’s also okay!), and know that your name is being called out in the holy city. Just because…

And I cried. Because somehow someone who doesn’t even know me is praying for me while on hajj.

I thanked her for her duas, and then she floored me with her beautiful words. I got her permission to share them with you…

Now you’ve gone and made me cry

Kheir, dear. If we can recognize our tests for what they are, that in itself is a blessing. I pray you derive the wisdom, strength, beauty and growth from your experience, and your new journey. Inshallah.

Yeah, life is complicated. Each and everyone of us are complicated. It’s there just beneath the veneer of ‘normality’ – our true roughed up selves.
(There’s that Jack Nicholson movie called ‘As Good As It Gets’ where one character says she just wants ‘normal’, and her eavesdropping mother in all her wisdom interrupts her by shouting “It doesn’t exist!”)

It takes courage to be honest/truthful with ourselves, to stop ignoring our true voices, to live our lives with integrity. Alhamdulillah that He has given you the chance to do that. But you know this.

And He knows, and we do not.

And there’s beauty in our pain, isn’t there? The way it can soften/toughen us in turns, the way it makes us seek Him, the way it makes us feel like a child again for His love, affection, pleasure, approval, the way it makes us depend on Him… The way it can open our eyes to the Truth.

Surely only love can make us want to prayer for people that we’ve never met, only love can make us want justice for strangers suffering unfairly, only love can make us see beauty in things that on the surface look completely disastrous.

Happy Love Thursday

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Be kinder than necessary because everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle

I saw this on an email forward and I immediately identified with it.

Once upon a time, I was really scared that I was bipolar. Well, I was scared that there was something really wrong with me, mentally. Like, if I was happy, I would be almost manic, I didn’t get sad, I got panic attacks, I didn’t get angry, I got enraged. Sometimes I felt like I was not really living my life but watching someone else live it for me. Sometimes I had no idea who I was.

I’ve since figured out what was wrong with me. Thankfully I do not have a metal problem, I had an emotional problem. I am now a different person than I was a year ago – completely different, and now I actually feel like myself, like I am the one living my life.

Anyway, there were times in my life I would get super pissed at any little thing, like a cashier being rude (in my opinion at least), but now, I’ve realized that, indeed, we are all fighting some battle. And being kind to someone sometimes makes the biggest difference in their life, or at least, their day. It also makes us feel much better. Try it!

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Giveaway Monday & the fireworks

We went to Nathan Phillip Square for fireworks on Saturday night. Every time they were set off, my almost 3 year old would exclaim “FIREWORKS!” Then at the end when they were noisy and “popping” very fast and frequently, my 4 year old tried to hide, then started hugging my leg, then told us how totally scared he was.

I’ve never seen fireworks set off from a building before – it was cool, and interesting, mostly the 2 people that came down the sides of the building with some sort of exploding fireworks strapped onto their backs!

Anyway, I reviewed Roxio Creator 2009, which I think is pretty great, and I have one copy for giveaway!! Yay! Leave a comment and I’ll do a random draw next Monday. Good Luck!

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I wish I…

Was trained at some type of martial arts.

Knew how to play drums really well.

Lived in more than just 2 countries.

Was tidier.

Could drive a truck and/or a motorbike. (Don’t ask – I’ve wished this since I was a teenager I think!)

Lived on my own private island.

Had more kids. (Well, sort of. A girl, or 2, really.)

Knew how to sew.

Was an awesome photographer.

Spoke more than just one language fluently.

Could supply constant happiness to every single child in this world, or at least take away any suffering.

Had the secret to world peace hidden somewhere under all the clothes on my bedroom floor, and when I clean up later today I could discover it! (We can hope, right?)

Was able to give birth to Transformers, because I fear one day my youngest would realize that he’s just human and he wouldn’t know how to live with the disappointment.

What do you wish?

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Speedlinking & a pic of my friend

The hope bracelet has a new home with my beautiful friend, just because she is very sweet, and I think it looks prettier on her hands!

I don’t know why, but I really love cute ribbons, and these are like “super cute ribbons”!

“Seeing the Everyday” looks like a fabulous magazine, and you may also want to check out all the other magazines you should be reading.

Bizarre but very intriguing.

I love bamboo socks, if you haven’t tried them, you really should!

And in case you were keeping track, now I am reading The Soloist.

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