Do you want to ‘have it all’?

A few weeks ago I was interviewed by a journalist based in Scotland, we did it at 5:30am, my time, the kids were asleep and our conversation was lovely. Among other things, she wanted to discuss my thoughts on the subject of ‘moms having it all’; I laughed.

While mothers are likely the strongest group of individuals, clearly able to accomplish seemingly impossible feats, run successful businesses, and operate as efficient, multi-tasking super powers, we are still only human.

I would love to say that I feel completely fulfilled since I’ve been working from home, I wish I could say that I have it all now, if only I could tell you that working for yourself at a job you completely love while being a full time mom is satisfying. Sadly, all I can say is that it’s challenging, it’s a struggle to find balance, and the guilt of semi-neglected children and missed client deadlines can be soul wrenching.

When I decided to be a work at home mother, ‘having it all’ was not my desire, it was really because 1) running my own business was something that I had always wanted to do, and 2) there was no way we could afford to send three kids to daycare! I think it’s a matter of ‘doing whats best for our family’, more than ‘having it all’.

There is no way that I feel like this is my ‘having it all’, as I sit here typing this on the dinning room table, I am holding my sick baby while he tries to press all the shiny buttons on my laptop, I just had to delay a project launch, and I’ve only done one hour of work so far for the day, earlier this morning while the kids were asleep.

Sometimes I think the question is not ‘how do we have it all’, but more ‘how do we keep ourselves from falling apart’.