Do you want to ‘have it all’?

A few weeks ago I was interviewed by a journalist based in Scotland, we did it at 5:30am, my time, the kids were asleep and our conversation was lovely. Among other things, she wanted to discuss my thoughts on the subject of ‘moms having it all’; I laughed.

While mothers are likely the strongest group of individuals, clearly able to accomplish seemingly impossible feats, run successful businesses, and operate as efficient, multi-tasking super powers, we are still only human.

I would love to say that I feel completely fulfilled since I’ve been working from home, I wish I could say that I have it all now, if only I could tell you that working for yourself at a job you completely love while being a full time mom is satisfying. Sadly, all I can say is that it’s challenging, it’s a struggle to find balance, and the guilt of semi-neglected children and missed client deadlines can be soul wrenching.

When I decided to be a work at home mother, ‘having it all’ was not my desire, it was really because 1) running my own business was something that I had always wanted to do, and 2) there was no way we could afford to send three kids to daycare! I think it’s a matter of ‘doing whats best for our family’, more than ‘having it all’.

There is no way that I feel like this is my ‘having it all’, as I sit here typing this on the dinning room table, I am holding my sick baby while he tries to press all the shiny buttons on my laptop, I just had to delay a project launch, and I’ve only done one hour of work so far for the day, earlier this morning while the kids were asleep.

Sometimes I think the question is not ‘how do we have it all’, but more ‘how do we keep ourselves from falling apart’.

Thoughts from Specs

Oh oh, seems like a hard day. Its just so much an echo of my thoughts on this topic...sometimes, men don’t realize how tough it is to work AND raise kids...maybe mothers end up feeling more guilt for stuff left undone.

But nothing a good hug won’t cheer...here: *hug*

:D

Thoughts from Fatima

Assalamwalaikum

I know what you mean, it can get really tough when the little ones get sick, its like you want to give them all the attention, but at the same time you have to juggle in all the “OTHER” work. Hope your little one gets well soon inshallah.

Wassalam Walaikum Fatima (Muzzammil’s mother)

Thoughts from Marty Ellen

"While mothers are likely the strongest group of individuals… we are still only human.”

I like that… so very true.  One of the most amazing things my mother ever said to me growing up was “I’m sorry.” I always looked up to her as this superhero, but when she apologized to me for making mistakes, it made me see her as human and actually respect her even more because I saw that even through her weaknesses, she still tried her hardest and sacrificed so much for me.  I pray that all of you mothers will be encouraged that regardless of how difficult things can be now, one day your children will appreciate all you’ve done for them.

Thoughts from Maliha

Salamaat,
Motherhood is stress any way you spin it. I hope your little babycakes is feeling better Inshaallah. Shaz, only you know how much you can take on without falling apart; and then its all about balancing. Just don’t forget about you in the midst of it all....May He grant you tawfeeq. amin.

Thoughts from shaz

thanks for your thoughts… I really need the support these days!