Bad, bad mommy

Ok internets… I am not always the well-balanced, loving, thoughtful mommy that I make myself out to be! Neither are you, right? Right?

I am excellent at fun, seriously, I will be a kid over a grownup any day, I love sidewalk chalk, paint, stickers, markers, I am usually game for anything, however, when it comes to cleaning up the mess, or the kids, I usually, kinda, umm, don’t. The mousehunter loves this aspect of me!

So, you know how my kids were sick, well, umm, I don’t always remember to give them their medication on time, and when I say “always”, I really mean “ever”! I know, I know! My husband usually has to call from work to remind me to medicate them!

I allow them to play with plastic butter knives, you know, so they can pretend they are sword fighting, or whatever else it is that they do with them, I honestly don’t know, but they do enjoy it and they ask for them every single day…they have never gotten hurt though!

You know things like, feeding the kids, and umm, giving baths, and brushing teeth, and homework, and other such, chores, yeah, well, I am not good with those, I mean, I obviously do them, but I can’t say that I excel at those things, and when I say “excel”, I really mean that I do a very “half-assed” job!

My biggest problem though, has to be my inability to fold and pack away laundry! I kid you not! I think it goes against my very nature to handle laundry!! Currently, the kids’ room is completely covered in clothing, it’s so bad that my kids learned to “dig” through the pile to find clothes for themselves!

And before I totally discount myself as a good mother, I will stop.

Thoughts from Surviving

Haha!!!  I’’m guilty of all but the butter knife thing. Although that probably has more to do with my fear of them falling and injuring themselves, which would lead to hospital visits and more medication for me to forget, haha!

Thoughts from jj

girl! get out of here, twin! I SUCK at bathing the kids, feeding them, reading them stories and doing homework. Since coming home from the hospital, my super hubby has been handling all those things and now that I am up and better, i am only slowly getting around to folding clothes and doing dishes.

I suppose you and mousehunter have a good arrangement where you are creative and he does the family necessities stuff.

me and my hubby has an arrangement where he does everything, i nag him about how bad a job he did! LOL! no seriously, i better ship up before he finds a new wife and mother! :D

Thoughts from shaz

"me and my hubby has an arrangement where he does everything, i nag him about how bad a job he did!”

that used to be us!!!! I kid you not! now, however, its more like i do everything in my half-ass way, and if he complains, I tell him he can do it himself if he’s not happy! hahah he doesn’t do anything besides laundry, only when HE runs out of underwear, and take out the garbage!

Btw, is TriniHubby OCD as well???

Thoughts from mummyjaan

What a relief to read that there is another horrible horrible mommy - just like me - out there.  You think we could form some sort of club?

Thoughts from Mona UmIbrahim

stop this negative thinking now ! repeat after me ‘i am a good mother’ now say this 10 times. the truth is, we try our best, but sometimes there are situations where we cannot do as good as a job as we would like, but that doesn’t mean we are failures. It just means that once things settle down, i.e. all kids are out of diapers/nursing/sick all the time/teething/tantrums/picky eaters/ etc, we will be able to handle things better God willing. I could sit here and find ways to believe that i’m a bad mother, wife, sister, daughter, muslim but i choose not to because that would bring me down and just dig me in a deeper hole of worthlessness. now put a smile on your face and go fold some laundry Wassalam.

Thoughts from Mona UmIbrahim

also, let me tell you what is a bad mother, a mother that:
- verbally abuses their child
- physical abuse
- does not show any love or kind words to their child
- overdrugs the child
- smokes and/or drinks in front of the child
- is alcoholic and/or drug addict
- does not feed her children
i think you get what i mean…

Thoughts from earthmom

Salam Shaz,
We’re in the same boat. I always do housework halfheartedly AND folding clothes is always at the bottom of my to do list. I’m glad to know that there are more mums like us so I can tell my perfectionist mum it is a normal occurrence hehe.

Thoughts from shaz

thanks Mona! Ok, I am a good mom!!

earthmom, my mom is not even a perfectionist herself, but still expects me to be!! hahah

Thoughts from sf

If only we had someone to do those not so interesting jobs at home for us. I just am not cut out to do all this!!! Oh,well, I do what I can. I found a that once my youngest could walk, then I can as well give them a bath/shower together with her older sister. When I do laundry, I try to fold the clothes ASAP or it would take me days before I get to them. I know some mothers would make Martha proud but am not one them,hehehehe, atleast there is food and love for my kids . Right now am writing this while my daughter is taking off the books of the shelf(it’s like she’s been sent just to make me work more!). Alhamdullilah, my oldest daughter(will be 7 soon)sometimes would help, well,if she’s not too *tired*. I guess our parents felt the same way when we were growing and I keep telling myself that they will soon grow up and bathe/feed themselves.

Thoughts from Umm Layth

as salamu ‘alaykum

We all lack in our mother skills. What should really worry us is when we lack in example and when we allow our homes to become places of haram things. We should really strive to make them peaceful, barakah-filled homes. May Allah help in this task. Ameen

Anyhow.. I am also guilty of the folding clothes thing. I can wash them, fold the towels, sheets, and stuff, but putting them away and folding up EVERY little thing… I suck with.