Haunted by my childhood?

Removing the last article of clothing and throwing it at the mom, the child said “I don’t need anything from you!!”, and then walks away…

On another occasion, the child was crying at bedtime, after refusing to sleep on any bed in the house… “Well where do you want to sleep??” asked the dad… “Outside with the dogs!!” screamed the child…

No, that’s not my kids… but it was my parents’ kid! I was so precious, wasn’t I?? I still remember those and other such events from my childhood, even before I was 8 years old.

And now… “Well I will clean up at school but not at home!!” said my preschooler with all his might after we asked him to clean up his mess. How is it that he can’t even tie his shoes but he can talk back to me! Oh, and my toddler… this morning was crying to get his diaper changed, but didn’t want me to do it, and didn’t want his dad to do it! He ran behind the chair and sat on the ground… I was so reminded of myself as a child.

And now, unlike the other ‘first-time’ moms that I know with babies the same age as my youngest, I am NOT in a rush for him to walk and talk back to me…

Is it healthy?

Lately, there has been a lot of discussion about “trans fats” and overweight kids in the news, here in Canada at least. I came across a mom writing about the issue of kids diets. I agree that it seems to be mainly a problem of parents not teaching kids to make the right choices when it comes to making decisions about what to eat.

Now, I realize my kids are pretty young, but I think the training starts really early, and although I am no expert on the subject, I have learnt some things along the way. As my kids got old enough to eat a few meals a day, I started to care a lot more about the choices that I made for my family. A couple major changes are…

1. no more microwave!


2. significant decrease in the number of packaged food and snacks


3. increased fruits and vegetables


4. fast food only 1 time per week, and in very small portions

I don’t like microwaves. I don’t think that there is any benefit to them. Read more here. Packaged and processed foods are full of trans fats, and other undesirable stuff.

And no, I am not anal about it… but I think that making healthy decisions starts at home, and starts when they are young, so at least I want to do my part to help them. I do let them have snacks… I give them what they like in small portions, as a treat, and they respect that. When planning meals, I try to follow the Canada food guide, and make sure they have a balanced meal… that is key. Simple things help to go a long way, like carrots and broccoli, baby spinach, corn… I try to keep veggies that my kids enjoy, and incorporate them into our meals.

Knowledge is key to making the good choices… stay informed!

How many times.

How many times I find myself saying “How many times”!

Pregnancy number 1 was filled with lots of pregnancy books, baby books, pregnancy and baby websites, child development books… the “do’s” and “don’ts” of parenting.

I remember, I think, that ‘good parenting’ was not to ask a child “how many times have I told you”. I guess it makes sense, I mean can a child really answer that question? And I think the point is that it confuses kids, I guess they forget about the thing that they are ‘not supposed to be doing’, and start to concentrate on ‘how many times’!

I am thinking of the reason I feel the need to bring “how many times” into the argument conversation, is because we just so fed up of saying the same thing over and over that we need to make a point by saying “how many times”. But the sad thing is that my 3 and a half year old does not really grasp the concept of “how many times”, and yesterday he actually tried to answer me! I asked him “how many times I told you not to do that?”, and he thought about it and answered “I don’t know”.

Of course nothing makes you madder when you’re arguing with kids than when they actual answer your rhetorical questions, but I just felt silly and had to laugh. What is the poor kid supposed to answer… it must be so confusing to them… and I bet that they think that we are arguing with them because they can’t remember “how many times”!

I overheard my eldest son trying to correct the middle one… “How many times you not supposed to do that!”

Parenting, to be or not to be.

A mother.

A toddler in my bed kicks me all through the night, he puts his hand in my face, and as I move further away from him, he comes closer to me. A baby is crying in his crib… for milk I imagine… it’s hard to get up when my whole body is in pain from sleeping (trying to sleep) in one position all night, sandwiched between toddler and husband. I took the opportunity to remove the toddler from my bed, its hard to hold 23lbs when I’m half asleep, then bring the newborn into bed.

Later in the morning, as I am washing dishes, differed from last night, at 7:30am before the kids wake up, I ignore the faint cries of the baby (its just a whine for now), I wonder what made me want to be a mother. And as I stand there, my t-shirt (which I had to change early in the morning because of leakage) smelt like it was rotting… must be because my husband forgot my clothes in the washer for 2 days and then thought it would be a good idea not to re-wash them!

At least he’s doing the laundry… right?!

A few diaper changes and spit-ups later, as I put on a stained vest for the baby, a Telus Mobility logo on the front, I am again pondering the benefits of motherhood. I remember the days of working late at the office… thinking only about my career goals, having enough money to actually shop for myself, enjoying eating out with my husband, sleeping late on the weekends… I don’t even recognize that person… or is it that I don’t even recognize ‘this’ person…

My baby laughs out loud just looking at me, my toddler is dancing around the room, and the preschooler is lying next to me waiting to go outside to play with the new boat-shaped sandbox that daddy put together for him 2 days ago.

Even though my head and face hurts because I started to clench my jaws in my sleep, since I was pregnant with my first child, even though I am too sleepy to open my eyes fully, even though all I want to do is be alone, relax, converse with other adults (about something other than kids), a mother would not have it any other way!

Caught with pants down.

Kids at 3 years old are curious about their ‘private parts’, at least that is what a few internet searches on the topic revealed.

My now 3 and a half year old was caught a couple times with his pants down… or at least with his pants half way up! We were not sure what was up with him, so the usual talk about private parts ensued, and we left it like that.

So one morning as the kids were playing “a little too quietly” in the room, I stealthy went to check up on them…

3 year old: {in the process of removing his pants}

2 year old: {playing with his blocks, totally oblivious}

3 year old: {going to sit on his chair with no pants}

2 year old: Hey! Jockey Shorts!

3 year old: Shhhhh!

3 year old: {spotted me looking at him} Hey! Come out of here!

Ahhhh… the joys of parenting!