Have you ever felt like you just weren’t cut out to be a grownup?
Umm, yeah, me neither… I was just wondering, that’s all. As you were…
Try not to be too jealous either, ok?
The last time I was at a 9-5-ish type job, I was there for years, and people either really liked me or really did not like me, there was rarely a person that would say “hmm, Shazia? She’s ok… I’m not really sure how I feel about her”... It seems I am having the same type of effect on the people here!
I love people that are genuinely nice, I do, because I feel like there are very few really nice people in the world, and also because I could never, ever, no matter how much I try, be one of those nice people. It’s very sad. You guys think I’m nice right?? (Please say yes!) In real life though… not so nice! But I totally love when people appreciate my “mean-ness”, seriously, it brings me much joy! And I love it even more when people can respond to my mean-ness in kind… those people are hard to come by!
I feel like I did find my soulmate here though, and she is awesome! She’s so awesome in fact, that I think “I am awesome” might be written on her resume, right under “I am humble”. It’s really hard to explain her full “awesomeness”, but I will share some of our emails with you, so you can get an idea of why she I think she’s so awesome…
Awesome girl to me:“You are mean and judgmental!”
Me to Awesome girl:
“Isn’t it mean and judgmental to call someone mean and judgmental???”
Awesome girl to me:
“No… In my case I’m so awesome it’s just being honest.”
Me to Awesome girl:
“hahahaha… that was pretty funny!”
Awesome girl to me:
“I know right!
I’m terribly witty… Don’t be jealous, OK.”
Me to Awesome girl:
“i gotta leave, but if i didn’t then surely i would be able to think of something witty-er to say! for sure!!!”
Awesome girl to me:
“Too bad… I was waiting looking forward to being entertained by your spectacular wit but, alas, you are not here!
Now I will be sad all day :(”
And so goes my day… we REALLY enjoy our lunch breaks!
*I totally got Awesome girl’s approval to post this! (In case anyone was wondering)
Completely inappropriate? Yeah, that sounds like me
If you know me in real life, you know that I am ultra-frank, maybe too frank, and I’ve been known to put my foot in my mouth quite often on occasion. Apparently, even being at work, with people that I’ve known for only a week, doesn’t stop me from saying whatever I want, no matter how completely inappropriate!
Co-worker (with really strong Indian accent): Well, you know, you have the wision!
Me: Wision?
Co-worker: Yeah, your wision!
Me: What is a wision?
Co-worker: You know your WISION *Opens out his hands to the monitior*
Me: Ohhh, a VISION! Amm, ok Indian boy! hahaha
*Wonders to myself if that was offensive*
Me: Hey, ummm, was that offensive?
Co-worker: What?
Me: Well, I called you “Indian boy”...
Co-worker: Really? I didn’t hear you
Me: Oh… so is it offensive?
Co-worker: No, no
Me: Well, I mean I am Indian too, so I just said it, but I really can’t have conversations with sensitive people
Co-worker on the other side of our cubicles whom I’ve never met before: Hi! I heard your conversation and I thought I would introduce myself!
Me: Hmmm, you heard all that? Wow. Ok, nice to meet you. Did you find it offensive?
Co-worker on the other side of our cubicles whom I’ve never met before: No, no, I was laughing over there!
Me: Phew! Ok, well, nice to meet you!
Another co-worker from the other side: Hi, I thought I would introduce myself too!
Me: Great to meet you! You were on vacation last week? Hmmm
*Thinks to myself, "great, last week, the guy next to me called me feisty, and now everyone knows I don't like sensitive people and I make slightly amusing, but sorta lame, and generally inappropriate comments! the next 5 months, 2 weeks, and 3 days should be fun!"*
Just thought you should know
I heading down there right now!
Seriously people, I am just cool like that
Me: Well, I am from trinidad right
Co-worker: Dude! You’re from trinidad? Wow!
Me: Ummm?
Co-worker: That explains a lot!
Me: Like?
Co-worker: How you’re so cool
Me: Brudda, that is not cuz I’m from trinidad, that is just cuz I’m me!
